


4th Gen It Boy (or maybe not)

by newrulesbian



Category: TOMORROW X TOGETHER | TXT (Korea Band)
Genre: Bigender Park Jimin (BTS), Canon Compliant, Gen, Gender Identity, Gender Issues, Nonbinary Character, Nonbinary Choi Yeonjun, Nonbinary Park Jimin (BTS), Not Beta Read, Soft Choi Soobin, Soft Park Jimin (BTS), inspired by kai calling yeonjun "noona"
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-08
Updated: 2020-11-08
Packaged: 2021-03-08 23:53:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27445177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newrulesbian/pseuds/newrulesbian
Summary: Questioning your gender identity can be really confusing for anyone, including 4th gen it boy Choi Yeonjun.Featuring Jimin giving him advice and being supportive.Created due to my wanting of nonbinary Yeonjun fics and me projecting.
Relationships: Choi Soobin & Choi Yeonjun
Comments: 7
Kudos: 72





	4th Gen It Boy (or maybe not)

Yeonjun has been confused lately. 

He isn’t sure why, but something- everything- seems off in ways it never has before. 

He’s been doing well in practice but something about it all seems wrong. 

Ever since promotions for Minisode 1: Blue Hour began, Yeonjun has been feeling more and more off.  
He knows it’s not wearing the crop tops, despite his nervousness at wearing them at first he actually really loves them.  
It’s not the longer hair either; at first he wasn’t sold on it but his members convinced him it looked really good, especially with the pink color. Not to mention MOA seemed to like his ponytails too. 

He thinks it might have to do with his members. Never in a bad way of course, he’d do anything for any and all of them.  
But lately Hueningkai (and the others but it’s mostly Hueningkai) have been calling him “Yeonjun-noona” more than “Yeonjun-hyung”.  
He knows it’s just for fun and teasing him, one of the members favorite activities, but why does he like it?  
He’s a boy-he’s literally called the “4th gen it boy”- he’s not supposed to like being called “noona” as much as he likes being called “hyung”. Kai is calling him an older sister, a girl, so why doesn’t he just tell him to stop? Why does he hope they keep calling him that?

Now don’t misunderstand Yeonjun.  
He’s not exactly known for someone who sticks to gender norms in a strict matter (some of it being an idol, some of it just being him). He knows anyone can wear and present themselves in any way they want, regardless of gender, but this feels different in some way, and he doesn’t really know why. 

He wants to talk to one of the members about it, but he’s not sure who, and he’s not even sure what his problem is. He knows he’s not a girl, and he feels like a boy sometimes, but what is his problem?  
He knows what nonbinary is: someone who’s not a boy or a girl but somewhere in the middle, but that can’t be him because he does feel like a boy sometimes and when speaking English he is fine with being referred to as “he”. 

Not wanting to talk to one of his members about his issue, and not sure what to search for online, he decides one of his BTS-sunbaenims might be able to help him. Yeonjun admires all of the BTS members greatly, but thinks Jimin is probably the best candidate to ask, remembering seeing things online about Jimin defying gender-roles. Hopefully Jimin would have more information. If he couldn’t answer his questions, maybe he could point him in the right direction. 

Having a plan set, and feeling more confident about it, Yeonjun decides to text Jimin to meet up.

“Hi Jimin-sunbaenim I am kind of confused about something. I wasn’t sure who to ask but you seemed like the right person and I was wondering if you had any answers or just more information,” Yeonjun wrote as an introduction.  
To his surprise, Jimin responded almost immediately, asking him to meet in the artist lounge later to talk.  
After arriving and chatting for a bit to catch up, Yeonjun explained his situation. Everything from sometimes feeling weird while looking in the mirror to being okay ecstatic even about Hueningkai calling him “noona” lately. He explained it all to Jimin, who reassured him throughout, occasionally asking questions or giving him reassuring words. 

“Well,” Jimin started, “it sounds like you’re questioning your gender identity Yeonjunie,” he said gently.  
“But I can’t be,” Yeonjun replied. “I know I’m not a girl and I don’t think I’m nonbinary.”  
“Why don’t you think you’re nonbinary?” “Well, I know I’m not a girl, I don’t feel like one, but sometimes I like feminine things, but I still don’t feel like a girl. I don’t always feel like a boy, but I don’t feel like a girl either” Yeonjun elaborated. “But I don’t think I’m nonbinary because I don’t feel in between a boy and a girl.” 

“Ah I see.” Jimin said. “Well Jjunie, I think you might be a bit mixed up about what nonbinary really means. You see, it’s not just someone in between male or female, though that is part of it. You don’t have to feel like a man and a woman to identify as nonbinary- that’s called bigender which is how I identify. But nonbinary is more of an umbrella term, or a spectrum if you’d rather think of it that way, that includes anyone who doesn’t identify under either of the two binary genders. What you’re describing of feeling mostly like a boy but sometimes not might be either demiboy or boyflux, which are two nonbinary identities that fall under the nonbinary umbrella.” Jimin explained in depth.

“Wait you’re nonbinary Jimin-sumbaenim? What pronouns do you use?” Yeonjun asked, wanting to be respectful.  
“Ah you’re so cute Yeonjunie, but yes I use any pronouns. Does what I said about nonbinary make sense? If you don’t feel nonbinary you don’t have to identify that way at all, but I just wanted to make sure you have the right information”  
“Yeah it does, thank you for everything!” Yeonjun spoke.  
“Oh you’re welcome Yeonjun, it was no problem at all, I’m glad I could help in any way and I hope you find the answers you’re looking for!” Jimin exclaimed. 

That encounter was several weeks ago. 

Yeonjun had been thinking a lot about what Jimin said, the information often ruminating through his mind at inconvenient times, causing him to overanalyze what he was doing, especially if it was in some way gender related.  
In the back of his mind, Yeonjun knew he was nonbinary. It was cemented into his thoughts ever since Jimin had fully explained what it meant to identify that way. But he was scared- so scared. He was scared of not his members rejecting him, of not fitting in, of not being normal. Coming out is never easy, and though he rationally knew his members would love him no matter what, the what if’s terrified him. 

He planned on just keeping it his little secret, not saying a word about his newly discovered identity… until Soobin confronted him.

Apparently his leader had noticed the eldest distancing himself from the rest of the group (he hadn’t meant to, honest, he was just too focused on his own head to realize what the others were up to), and had wanted to make sure the pink-haired hyung was okay.

Silently cursing Soobin’s thoughtfulness, Yeonjun slightly panicked. What was he supposed to say? Should he lie and make up and excuse about being distant, hopefully not hurting the other members’ feelings in the process? Or, he could, even more terrifyingly, come out. Neither option seemed particularly appealing, but Yeonjun knew he had to choose one. 

Deciding this was a good a time as any, Yeonjun blurted out “I’m nonbinary.”  
Not giving a chance for Soobin to respond, he continued, “it’s why I’ve been accidentally avoiding you guys. I’ve been confused about my identity and needed time to think but I didn’t mean to push y’all away I promise, please don’t be mad.”  
“Oh Yeonjun-hyung I’m so proud of you!” Soobin exclaimed. Seeing the confused look on his face, Soobin elaborated. “Coming out is never easy, and the fact that you were dealing with all of this on your own, right after comeback no less, shows just how strong you are.” Soobin explained gently.

That was all it took for Yeonjun to start crying. He knew his members would accept him, but knowing something and experiencing it were two very different things.  
“Are you planning on telling the others? You don’t have to if you’re not ready.”  
“Yeah, but I’m nervous, will you go with me Binnie?”  
“I’ll always by your side hyung.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone, I'm Cole, thank you so much for reading!
> 
> I've written many fics (and other things too) before but seldom publish them but this seemed especially important, as I feel more nonbinary representation is needed in fics. If this does well maybe I'll write some more? Who knows!
> 
> I'm also @lesbijun on twitter !!


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